I just got back from taking a new test drive of the new Hummer H2, which for those of your just tuning in, is a civiliian only model hummer produced in conjunction with GM and marketed by GM.

My sister rolled the family bronco last week on a rural road after a blowout, and after doing a complete 360 back to upright, came out with a scratch on the back of her head that didn't even require stiches. If they were still selling them new, I suspect we'd have the new model by now...

So, being in the market for a new Real SUV, we decided to make the trip to test drive the latest and greatest offering the H2, and I was suitably impressed at what they've done... The ride is as smooth as a sedan all the way up to 80mph on the freeway, but the thing is massive, and unfortunatly has small windows which make visitibility dificult. It's got far more room inside than an orginal hummer, and has all the creature comforts you'd expect in a $50,000 SUV. They've kept true to the hummer brand, and it looks to be a very competent 4 wheel drive, with very low gearing options, and high ground clearance. They lack the ability to inflate and deflate the tires from inside the vehicle, but for half the price of the orginal, something's gotta go.

I'm sold, and hoping that my dad is too, as I'd love to be able to steal it on weekends when I come home to visit....

Matthew

hummer

[beavis] He said "hummer"! [/beavis]

http://www.suck.com/daily/99/05/20/daily.html

although with the Curse of the Three-Year-Old Suck, naturally none of the links work

Peter

Have you guys that drive these massive beasts ever considered what would happen to the occupants of a smaller car if you hit them ?

(sorry, I'm staying in the US for a 10 days and I can't quite get used to the size of the things people think are cars around here)

Can you name the truck with four-wheel drive
Smells like steak, and seats thirty-five?
Canyonero! Canyonero!
Well, it goes real slow with the hammer down.
It's the country-fried truck endoresed by a clown
Canyonero! Canyonero!
Hey, hey!
Twelve yeards long, two lanes wide,
Sixty-five tons of American Pride!
Canyonero! Canyonero!
Top of the line in utility sports,
Unexplained fires are a matter for the courts!
Canyonero! Canyonero!
She blinds everybody with her super high-beams.
She's a squirrel-squashin', deer-smackin' drivin' machine.
Canyonero! Canyonero! Canyonero
Whoa, Canyonero! Whoa!

People don't care. All they care about is protecting themselves, despite the fact that SUVs have been shown to, more often than not, be more dangerous to be in than a ``regular'' car. For reference, see the original post where the Bronco flipped over because a tire blew out.

I wish people would realize this and go buy a Volvo, for God's sake. (Okay, so Volvos aren't what they used to be, but you get my point.)

Oh, the other major reason people in the US buy SUVs is to keep up with the Joneses. In fact, that's probably a more significant reason than safety.

Oh man, that was a bad episode....

See, now. Are you thinking of the one where Marge gets an SUV? 'Cause that wasn't a very good episode. But that song was in the one where Krusty becomes George Carlin for a while. And that one, I thought, was pretty good.

The marge SUV one is what I'm referring to. The only funny part is where home discovers the car is the "F Series." The lipstick cigarette lighter is very funny.

I thought the episode was too short and unfunny.

I have heard a statistic that you're more likely to be killed by being the "other car" in an accident with an SUV than you are being killed by a drunk driver. That is, SUV drivers are more dangerous than drunk drivers. I heard it on the radio from a talk show host and it wasn't attributed to any specific source, so it could be B.S., but it seems quite plausible to me. Leaves one to imagine the effect of a drunk SUV driver...

The reason for the vast popularity of SUV's is directly tied to the need of families for room plus the desire of men never to be seen in a minivan.

Wait a minute! Was that song even in the marge one? I remember the Krusty one now. I remeber that he "sold out" to do the commercial for the Canyonero. Then they wouldn't allow him back in the trendy comedy club.

What was the name of Marge's SUV?

Frankly, many Americans are amazed at the size of these things that people drive here. Thankfully, I don't know anyone who owns a Ford Excursion, or I fear I'd have the uncontrollable urge to smack them upside the head.

I'm sorry, but I must ask why you want another SUV. Frankly, I'm amazed the thing was able to spin the 360 without flipping earlier. I mean, I'm glad your sister is okay and all, but I've always felt that these aren't the best cars.

I mean honestly, most people are driving these things because it's a fad and they look cool (kinda). Very few people are using them as originally intended. Not to mention that they are the new soccer mom car. In my hometown, there is an abundance of not only soccer moms driving these things, but short soccer moms driving them. Nothing's funnier than a 5'4" woman behind the wheel of an Explorer.

I'm not really the one to speak, though. I've always been more practical than most people. Hell, I'm 22 and I drive a freaking minivan. But then again my minivan has a sleeker look, an empeg, a navigation system, and a 200HP engine. Of course, even edmunds admits the minivan image, which is unfortunate, because of many things:

1) The Honda Odyssey (my baby), handles far better than nearly any SUV
2) it has more cargo space than any consumer vehicle on the market (well, it did in 2002, but other minivans may have passed it now). This includes the Excursion, and the H2. My van has 68% more space than the H2
3) much less expensive. So SUV drivers enjoy spending more for less. I just don't get it.

I owned a Land Rover Discovery. It was nice. Well built, very sturdy, felt like I could go anywhere. But on every highway exit, I felt like I needed to go 20 mph so I wouldn't tip. It was simply an impractical car. Even while I was driving my '97 Discovery, I wished my family still had out '90 Oldsmobile Silhouette.

Time to take a little visit

The Canyonero makes appearances in both of those episodes. And probably cameo appearances in others.

Compare:

http://www.snpp.com/episodes/AABF10

vs.

http://www.snpp.com/episodes/5F10

Nothing's funnier than a 5'4" woman behind the wheel of an Explorer.

That is so true!

And what happened to the station wagon?

Have you noticed that there's now a commercial advertising a station wagon and the shtick is that people following it cannot come up with a term to describe it? Ever since the first time I saw it, I was screaming at the TV ``It's a station wagon!''

And, no, the other people in the psycho ward don't look at me as if I'm crazy.

Nothing's funnier than a 5'4" woman behind the wheel of an Explorer.

I'd argue that there's nothing scarier. Because, 95% of the time, in my experience, at the same time that she's trying to peek over the steering wheel, she's also putting on makeup, talking on the phone, and either swatting at her kids or ignoring them while letting them crawl all over her. And that assumes that there's not a cat or toy dog sitting on top of her head.

There's a toy dog on her head?

but yeah, I know what you mean. This country generally has some very bad drivers. In the past two days (rush hours of last night and this morning), I've seen two people do the stupidest things I've ever seen someone do in a car. I so wish I could describe these manuevers, but it would take a lot of space and nobody's interested anyway Just take my word for it that they were the stupidest things I've ever seen done in an automobile.

And yes, on commutes in the morning there's the regular peopleputting on makeup, shaving, reading the paper. The things people do....

EPA fuel economy: 11 mpg city/14 mpg highway (estimated).
32 gallon tank.

christ.

ah yeah, but with gas only 1.35 a gallon thats not even $50
hugh in-effecient SUVs for everyone yeah!!!!

matthew, your sister is lucky
one of the design flaws in the bronco was its narrow track which caused it to flip quite easily
they are still selling the bronco , it is now called the exploder....sorry explorer, which has a slight wider track
but as history has shown us still quite capable of flipping

Have you guys that drive these massive beasts ever considered what would happen to the occupants of a smaller car if you hit them ?

Death... And I assume that's why when I changed my daily driver vehicle from the Dodge RAM truck to the Dodge Neon, my insurance rates went down drastically. Insurance rates of those that drive large vehicles are higher than those that drive compacts. Why am I penalized for driving a vehicle that will protect me from death better than a small vehicle that won't? Because it's harder to sue the insurance companies when you're dead... Suck the beast drivers dry with high rates since chances are they'll live longer.
I drive my beast to tow my boat that weighs more than the Neon. What I really want to know is why do people think a 6000+ pound truck and trailer can stop in the same distance as a compact car? It can't, even with a compact car underneath it...

How do you like your RAM? My son wants to buy one (with help). Do you have a 4x4? If so, how has that held up?

Yes, most people that drive SUV's don't need them, but others do. Our familly has had an SUV since we owned a '76 K5 Blazer, so it's not a passing fad with us. My dad is a veterinarian, and has needed to move everything from dead great danes to live sick sea lions. I've got many great memories of taking the bronco camping on dirt roads in Death Valley, miles from any pavement or people...

I personally ride horses, and we're in the process of buying a horse trailer. This is either going to require a large SUV, or a large pick up. Seeing as we don't need an open bed, a pickup is a waste of space for us.

Now the hummer is Wretched Excess, as I stated... But it's the only real SUV they're still selling -- the rest are all soccer mom cars.

Matthew

It's absolutely true. Some people do need SUVs. The Suburban was originally made to help farmers and other folks that lived in the sticks to go to town and get supplies. Thus the name ``Suburban'', before it gathered its current connotation of ``in town, but not downtown''.

That, in fact, is one of my lesser problems with the whole thing. Now that they all have DVD players built into them and lipstick holders, etc., and are being sold at 500% profits, the folks that really need them are often unable to afford them. They used to be just plain old pickup trucks with lids.

I would have less problem with them if a different license were required to drive them. Or, hell, if any body were ever required to drive adequately in order to get a driver's license in the first place.

If you are goin to buy a 4x4 get a 2nd generation ram. That are the best 4wd still out there, if you ask me, I have had 6, loved every one of them. I have driven Chevies, and Fords. They Dont compare, the only other trucks I like are toyotas, but only as a compact truck.

Im agree completely the Hummer H2 and the H1 along with various other vehicles are the last true breed of SUV. I had my doubts about the H2 until I actually saw one in person. its just a lluxury version of the H1 with lots of different styling points, but they included most of the good stuff along with it.

I do admit some people need them. If you want to tow something there's definitely more power a truck-bed car than a car one. In that case I wouldn't put a minivan above them.

Although I couldn't help but wonder, wouldn't it be easier for your dad the veterinarian to haul animals in a minivan? There's more capacity and it's lower to the ground. It would seem pretty logical to me...

In reply to:

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How do you like your RAM? My son wants to buy one (with help). Do you have a 4x4? If so, how has that held up?

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I nearly got a Ram as my first car - I got a Vauxhall Nova in the end which most UKers will attest to being a pile of crap. I quickly dumped it and got a 2.8 Camaro as my next car but changed it for the 5.0 IROC shortly afterwards and haven't noticed a difference in my fuel bill. Yes it costs a lot living in the UK, but ripping the tarmac up leaving the office car park more than makes up for it - they are also incredibly rare and it makes a good conversation starter.

I've got an ex-police B&W Caprice on a boat from Jacksonville right now (to be a second car) - should be great fun reverse-parking at Sainsbury's!! I only saw one for real last week and they are f'ing huge!

Gareth
PS. Insurance is dirt cheap on American vehicles over here - my insurance bill went *down* from the Nova substantially.

In reply to:

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PS. Insurance is dirt cheap on American vehicles over here - my insurance bill went *down* from the Nova substantially.

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How cheap are we talking here? I'm 23 and get f*cked in the ass over my insurance and I want Golf GTI so I expect the premiums to get ever higher!

I'm currently getting farked for $200/month for my civic si.

I'm currently getting farked for $200/month for my civic si.

That wouldn't have anything to do with this would it?

tanstaafl.