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#348357 - 25/10/2011 06:37 Re: Baby! [Re: JBjorgen]
Roger
carpal tunnel

Registered: 18/01/2000
Posts: 5683
Loc: London, UK
Originally Posted By: JBjorgen
...when baby 3 comes in May, we'll have the same result...


I'm (truly) glad for you, but the truth is that it's not all kittens and sunshine, and perpetuating that myth just makes parents that are having problems (with sleep, with feeding, with whatever) think that they're the only ones. This is a bad thing.
_________________________
-- roger

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#348360 - 25/10/2011 07:12 Re: Baby! [Re: BartDG]
JeffS
carpal tunnel

Registered: 14/01/2002
Posts: 2858
Loc: Atlanta, GA
We are fortunate to have a good friend who is a professional photographer and has done free photos for us. She is VERY good- too bad no one is located here in Georgia to take advantage, because I'd easily recommend her.
_________________________
-Jeff
Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings; they did it by killing all those who opposed them.

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#348363 - 25/10/2011 12:37 Re: Baby! [Re: msaeger]
JBjorgen
carpal tunnel

Registered: 19/01/2002
Posts: 3584
Loc: Columbus, OH
Originally Posted By: msaeger
How old are they when you start trying to sleep train?


From the first week. The biggest thing to concentrate on right now is feeding. They're going to sleep most of the time anyway. Try to focus on when you feed, making sure they get a full feeding. This may require trying to keep them awake if they drift off after 10 minutes or so. Feedings will likely take about 30 minutes or so at this age. Eventually they will get more efficient. You can keep them awake by tapping their feet or unzipping their onesie and rubbing their sternum. You won't be 100% successful all the time, but just keep working at it.

What this does is it allows them to go longer periods between when they feel hungry again. Otherwise, they'll slip into a habit called snack feeding, where they get just enough to satiate them for the moment, but feel hungry again fairly soon.

You'll begin to notice that if they get a full feeding at every feeding, they'll begin to slip into a routine of feeding every 2.5 to 3 hours all by themselves.

Here's the wrinkle - sometimes babies just get hungry earlier than that, especially when going through a growth spurt. So you've got to begin studying your babies' cues. Most people just knee-jerk - If the baby is crying, shove a boob in the mouth or change it. You'll learn as the baby slips into a cycle which cries are the hungry ones and which are just the "I'm uncomfortable" ones. There's no way to learn this except to study your baby and get to knows its cues. That said, if the baby is hungry, even if it's been getting full feedings, feed it again. The schedule is there to establish patterns, not to deprive your child if its really hungry. Just make sure that it takes a full feeding, and it will slip back into the routine on its own.

If it has been three hours since the beginning of the last feeding, wake them up. This will be hard, because you're going to treasure the quiet moments. But it's necessary to establish the routine. This will also help to keep the baby full and happy. You'll find that after the initial minute or two of fussiness of being woken, the baby will indeed be hungry.

Last thing I can think of is that you should allow the baby to start sleeping for longer periods at night (after the late feeding around 10 or 11pm). A breast fed baby shouldn't go more than 5 hours between feedings though, so you should wake it up if it sleeps that long. You may risk under-nourishing the baby otherwise.

That should get your started. If you're interested in more later, either get the book or just ask.

EDIT: Your lactation consultant and/or the doctor will likely just tell you to feed on demand. Most people do this, because it doesn't take any work to feed the baby whenever it cries. This sacrifices long-term gain for short-term pacification. Your baby will eat the same amount either way if you do it properly and regain its birth-weight and beyond. It just takes more work on your part the first few weeks. It's actually quite liberating to have your baby on a schedule though, because you begin to recognize its cries and cues and you feel very confident that you know what you're doing - which is priceless as a first-time parent.


Edited by JBjorgen (25/10/2011 13:08)
_________________________
~ John

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#348367 - 25/10/2011 13:09 Re: Baby! [Re: JBjorgen]
msaeger
carpal tunnel

Registered: 23/09/2000
Posts: 3608
Loc: Minnetonka, MN
We were told to feed about every three hours and to wake him up to eat if he is sleeping which he is because that is all he does. It seems like at night like 1:00 am he wants more than my wife can produce or so it seems. We are thinking this because most of the time if he crys he will take the pacifier for a few minutes and fall asleep. Late at night that hasn't been doing it.

I have been trying to pacify him somehow when he is going through one of these moments because we are thinking if we were to feed him more than every few hours my wife wouldn't have anything to give him smile
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Matt

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#348369 - 25/10/2011 13:30 Re: Baby! [Re: Roger]
JBjorgen
carpal tunnel

Registered: 19/01/2002
Posts: 3584
Loc: Columbus, OH
Originally Posted By: Roger

perpetuating that myth just makes parents that are having problems (with sleep, with feeding, with whatever) think that they're the only ones. This is a bad thing.


I suppose if you want to look at it negatively. I think of it more as giving them hope. I'm not saying that there aren't legitimate biological reasons for babies not sleeping well, but if the baby is healthy there are things you can do as a parent to give them the best chance to do so.

Just because I can't solve a Rubick's cube doesn't mean it can't be solved. Just means I don't know the right method. My brother can take a good look at one and then solve it behind his back. How many times does he have to do it before I believe that it's not an aberration, or that he's not just lucky. The analogy eventually breaks down, but you know where I'm going with it...
_________________________
~ John

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#348370 - 25/10/2011 13:34 Re: Baby! [Re: msaeger]
JBjorgen
carpal tunnel

Registered: 19/01/2002
Posts: 3584
Loc: Columbus, OH
Originally Posted By: msaeger
We were told to feed about every three hours and to wake him up to eat if he is sleeping which he is because that is all he does. It seems like at night like 1:00 am he wants more than my wife can produce or so it seems. We are thinking this because most of the time if he crys he will take the pacifier for a few minutes and fall asleep. Late at night that hasn't been doing it.


Yeah. That sucks...her milk production should increase in a few days if that's the problem. If it doesn't, check with your lactation consultant, they can give you ideas like pumping after each feeding a bit to increase production.

EDIT: My wife says that her milk will typically come in within the next couple days, possibly even today. It's good to let the baby still suck, as that will help this to happen more quickly (stimulates hormones, etc...).


Edited by JBjorgen (25/10/2011 13:40)
_________________________
~ John

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#348371 - 25/10/2011 13:38 Re: Baby! [Re: JeffS]
msaeger
carpal tunnel

Registered: 23/09/2000
Posts: 3608
Loc: Minnetonka, MN
I have been looking for a local person that gives "digital negatives" for a reasonable price. No luck yet but I haven't looked too long.

We know a couple people who could do it but they wouldn't have any sets or props or whatever and my wife thinks we need some kind of stuff.
_________________________

Matt

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#348372 - 25/10/2011 13:43 Re: Baby! [Re: msaeger]
JBjorgen
carpal tunnel

Registered: 19/01/2002
Posts: 3584
Loc: Columbus, OH
I have someone for you. He's in the Minneapolis area, but he did our family photos. I'll PM you details.
_________________________
~ John

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#348374 - 25/10/2011 13:49 Re: Baby! [Re: JBjorgen]
msaeger
carpal tunnel

Registered: 23/09/2000
Posts: 3608
Loc: Minnetonka, MN
Originally Posted By: JBjorgen
Originally Posted By: msaeger
We were told to feed about every three hours and to wake him up to eat if he is sleeping which he is because that is all he does. It seems like at night like 1:00 am he wants more than my wife can produce or so it seems. We are thinking this because most of the time if he crys he will take the pacifier for a few minutes and fall asleep. Late at night that hasn't been doing it.


Yeah. That sucks...her milk production should increase in a few days if that's the problem. If it doesn't, check with your lactation consultant, they can give you ideas like pumping after each feeding a bit to increase production.

EDIT: My wife says that her milk will typically come in within the next couple days, possibly even today. It's good to let the baby still suck, as that will help this to happen more quickly (stimulates hormones, etc...).


When we went yesterday and go the pump they had he feed the baby and weighed him before and after she told us everything is normal. The consultant did recommend pumping after feeding so she has been doing that now.
_________________________

Matt

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#348383 - 25/10/2011 15:39 Re: Baby! [Re: msaeger]
DWallach
carpal tunnel

Registered: 30/04/2000
Posts: 3810
For what it's worth, you don't need a "professional" photographer to take good shots of your kids. You just need some sort of "advanced amateur" with all of this fancy gear sitting around. I've had multiple friends ask me to do things like this, and for a friend, I'll happily do it. It helps justify the money I spent on my far-too-expensive camera. Sigh.

The only thing the pros have that I don't have are professional strobes, with those neat reflector umbrellas, soft boxes, etc. Now, I have a friend who owns all that, and I can borrow it if need be, but then it starts to be less fun, and it's preferable to have a full-time photo studio where you've set everything up and balanced all the lights in advance.

You can very effectively compensate for this by shooting pictures on a *cloudy* (but not raining...) day. The clouds do an excellent job of sending you a uniform wall of light that give you great soft shadows.

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#348426 - 25/10/2011 20:38 Re: Baby! [Re: Roger]
altman
carpal tunnel

Registered: 19/05/1999
Posts: 3457
Loc: Palo Alto, CA
Originally Posted By: Roger
Originally Posted By: JBjorgen
...when baby 3 comes in May, we'll have the same result...


I'm (truly) glad for you, but the truth is that it's not all kittens and sunshine, and perpetuating that myth just makes parents that are having problems (with sleep, with feeding, with whatever) think that they're the only ones. This is a bad thing.


We had this with ours; the first had reflux and sleep was really never for more than 3 hours at a time. After she went on medication (just until about a year) she was much better but still not all the way through by any means. We did cry it to sleep and that worked, though was kinda nerve-wracking.

The second was just the easiest baby in the world. We are *so* glad they came that way round; if it'd been the easy one first then the troublesome one, we'd have found it a lot harder to deal with.

Summary: every baby appears to be different. Some are easier than others. You do not know what type you'll get until you have it. Some people only have easy ones, some people only hard ones. They all grow out of it, though.

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