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I was saying that asking believers your question doesn't well distinguish between theocratic and humanistic laws.

Agreed. I was trying to ask the question of everyone, not just "believers". I'm honestly trying to find out if there are any arguments for outlawing gay marriage that don't boil down to religion.

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If an action has bad consequences only intangibly or in the afterlife, then the place for a prohibition on it is in religious doctrine. For everything else, there's temporal authority.

Yup. I'm just trying to see if anyone's got decent arguments for the latter.
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Tony Fabris