Without question, this is a rant. I’m so angry I don’t even know what to do with myself. I’m ticked because I feel trapped and there’s nowhere to go and nothing I can do about it.

My wife had back surgery two years ago. It was a fusion, which is pretty hair stuff to be doing on a 24 year old. Normally people don’t develop back problems like she has until after 50. Still, her disk was pretty much disintegrated and there was nothing else she could do. During this surgery, a nerve was pinched meaning that she now has constant pain, and will have it for the rest of her life. Her pain management doctor put her on an array of drugs including Vocodin and Neurontin.

Another option was presented because taking these drugs for the rest of her life is not a good thing. This option was to put a nerve stimulator in her back. This is a battery driven device that they surgically implant into her back to constantly stimulate her nerves and trick the brain into thinking there is no pain. So she did this a few months back in hopes that it would cut down on the pain. She had a followup exam scheduled for two weeks after the surgery. Unfortunately, her job (already at risk due to the time she had taken off for surgery) gave her reason to believe they’d find a reason to let her go if she missed an important meeting that was scheduled on top of her follow up (a whole other rant). So she canceled and rescheduled, but the only time available was three weeks away. When that appointment came up, she was extremely sick (the bedridden, I can hardly walk kind) so she rescheduled again. This time they couldn’t schedule another appointment until over a month away. She was upset, but what could she do?

Because Neurontin is a BAD drug, she gradually weaned herself off of it, letting the stimulator pick up the slack. This was working well until her pain doctor started reducing her allotment of Vicodin. The doctor took her from five pills a day down to two, which was completely unreasonable. For a week my wife lived in abject pain trying to get through to the doctor to up her prescription. The doctor’s office was in the middle of a move, so they simply didn’t return her call. Finally she ran out of pain medicine and I had to sit there and watch her writhe in pain for a morning because she had no medicine. Finally we got through to them through repeated messages left with nurses that she had no medicine. The doctor called in an emergency prescription, but instructed my wife that the reason she didn’t have enough drugs was that she hadn’t come in for an appointment. It’s not like my wife was avoiding the appointment, though. It’s that the office can’t seem to schedule anything in a reasonable timeframe. The doctor grudgingly upped her prescription back up to 3 pills a day, but as we found out in the last two days that simply isn’t enough. She didn’t sleep at all today and I once again woke up to her crying in pain.

On top of all of this, the stimulator is cutting in and out so I fear they’ll have to go in and fix it, though I don’t know this for sure. Her doctor doesn’t know this, yet, though so she isn’t factoring it into the pain medication considerations. Two days ago my wife ran out of her muscle relaxer, which also helps to ease the pain. The doctor would not renew it because she hadn’t yet come in for her appointment.

We are traveling this weekend and I know there is no way my wife will be able to function on the allotment of medication the doctor has prescribed for her. She tried to call the doctor and explain this, but the nurse just explained she needed to come in first. My wife said she would go in right then, but they said they wouldn’t able to see her until Feb 8th. By this point I’m beside myself at the way she’s been treated- they have not returned her calls, blamed her for their overbooked schedule, and used reduction of pain medication as a punishment for someone whose life is dominated by pain.

I finally called the nurse and explained all this (not in a belligerent way, mind you. I’m generally calm even when I’m angry), but when I started explaining that all of this was driving my wife into depression she simply said “You are not my patient and I will not talk to you about this any more”.

The kicker is this- there’s no real option for us. This practice is pretty much the only game in town. There are other doctors, but they all are pretty much booked the same. I’d still like to change doctors on principle alone- I don’t feel like my wife is being cared for at all- but my wife is too tired to fight with them.

It hurts to see someone you love go through so much pain and watch those who are supposed to guide her through this show so much disregard for her. If I go to a restaurant and the waiter ignores me, 9 times out of 10 I don’t go back. My wife’s health is far more critical than a night out for dinner, but I suppose we just have to live with being ignored.

I’m sorry for this, but I just had to get it out somehow.