Current is would be equivalent to how much water I can get out of the pipe in a second. Voltage is how much pressure that water is coming out at.

See, that's the problem I've always had with the water metaphor. Those two are exactly the same to me. If I open a faucet, it's either going to deliver a lot of water (high pressure) or a little water (low pressure). I don't see how that relates to voltage and amperage.

The river versus firehose metaphor makes a bit more sense, but I still don't understand it. There is either a certain amount of water or there isn't.

Maybe the difference between volts and amps can be better explained to a more literal person like me in terms of exactly what the electrons themselves are doing. Does more volts mean more electrons or what?